Stoic manners

No Comments

A stoic, is a buddhist with an attitude.

Nassim Nicholas Taleb

What are manners?

Manners are behaviors, behaviors are of the way we conduct and act through life, they are attitudes and actions.

Manners spring from character and character is force.

What is true force?

The force is our star, our inner star.

Not dependant, not on opinions, not on people, not on anything, it is like the sun, it radiates force and energy,the force is a fiery fire consuming itself, everything thrown at it makes it stronger, it makes the fire  antifragile (it gains more from everything).

Manners are a matter of antifragility, (read Antifragile by Nassim Nicholas Taleb).

Manners make a man antifragile, man gains strength and power by using them.

What would be the system of manners? that is a great question, how do manners work. What are they for?, lets see.

Manners are ways of being, they are forms of how to do something, how to conduct ones actions and attitudes more specifically.

Manners are beautiful and forgotten, they cement correct human relationship, makes human contact more true and emphatic.

There are the two big realms when it comes to manners. Attitude and Actions.

These are the two fundamentals.

Stoic attitude.

This is the inner game of stoicism, and this is as we very well know profoundly important. This is where it all begins, this is where the star makes the first fusion reaction that conceives great character.

Stoic manners begin with the stoic attitude.

The Buddhists are detached, but the Stoics in comparison, are detached AND active, they wage wars,  either in commerce or some other worthy need.

There is one thing you need to know.

If you see the buddha in the road, kill him and Marcus Aurelius as well.

This is all you need to know to get your attitude right, there are no right ways, but there is your way, be your own Buddha and your way will be the truth.

Ralph Waldo Emerson famously said, that envy is ignorance and imitation is suicide. Truth is something to be searched and offered from the inside to the outside.

There is nothing truer, than your way.

This is  the greatest contribution anyone can make.

If we are to search for truth, we are to search within, and let action spring from within. this is where truth comes from, and this is where right attitude comes from.

There are some traits that diverse right attitudes have, but don’t let this mislead you, as your aim has to be your way.

Willingness for action, Amor Fati.

Willingness, you have to be willing to face life. This can also be seen as courage but that is more an attribute so willingness, that is more actionable, always be willing to engage.

What you resists, persist. Amor fati, is an act of courage and acceptance, life is a messy business, and as messy as it is, you have to take it, be it something good or something bad. Due to our western perception of the word “love”, you can stumble into believing that the act of loving everything is something of a romantic relationship to life, disgusting. The word love is so much more powerful, I’d prefer to use the definition that psychologist Jordan B. Peterson used that is of the acceptance and worthiness of being itself, the worthiness of existence, the contrary is nihilism and hell. Amor fati gains a new aura if you think about it this way, this is love of everything, love of existence, as messy and chaotic as it may be sometimes, Amor fati is the conscious action of acceptance and non-resistance to what is, it is an act of courage, it is an act of defiance.


This is because the search is over, the only search that is left is the truth search, your truth. Nothing outside of yourself is to be searched, those are only ghosts, fleeting ghosts.

This is why you are no longer reactive, you can think of it like not searching for cool, but more like being cool, this is how action springs from the self, from truth.

Higher thinking and creativeness

When you act from within, you do your own thinking, and you make your own fun, this is harder, it requires more mental stamina, and we are not used to it.

You become the creator, not the consumer, the creator of awesomeness, of business, of plans. You become the problem solver, not the problem reactor.


You are free, you do not longer have to wait for someone or something to happen, when attitude springs from within, you are free to take action, your action which gives you clarity of intent.


Now that attitude is settled, action comes.

Stoic action, is quality action. How we do anything we do everything.

When the attitude is right and it comes from truth, from personal truth.  We are ready for right action.

Quality is making everything as fine as we can possibly can.

From walking as honorable, as great as Alexander the great.

When speaking, speaking as good as Socrates.

When doing anything, doing it as finely as it can be made.

Quality action is made from two things, and that is attention and caring.

Attention is catching everything, every detail, every word, every movement, we are fully awake, and caring puts your star’s warmth into it.

Quality can be intuitively felt.

Great beer, great whisky, is made with this intention, with the fire from within and the attention that it needs.

This is the stoic manners.












1 Comment

We are always in a hurry, we always want to be somewhere else, we always need, just one more thing to be happy, happiness is so illusory it makes me laugh.

Chasing the carrot, that has become our way of life. Since some beloved people discovered how our brains work with new stuff, how we are hopelessly addicted to dopamine and novelty, we have become hurried creatures, but what are we after? Are we after something? Is it joy and fulfilment what we are always looking for? Or are we running from something, something we are too scared to admit.

Bought answers are right, but it is undeniable that we respond more to fear than any other emotion. Fair enough, that emotion has led to our survival in this planet by not being eaten by a mighty predator.

But history has made a big ironical joke of predators, his most scared creature, has become his most savage predator, we humans do not only kill ourselves, but every species and living thing in the planet.

Anakin Skywalker, couldn’t make a good Jedi, simply because he was scared . Poor bastard, did you noticed everything that happened to him, his mother was killed, and he knew by who. He was son of a slave. I mean really, poor bastard. And now, great Yoda says you are afraid, come on man! Of fucking course he is afraid.

But here is the what Anakin says that I believed really got him in trouble, and it is that he said no. Vulnerabilty, is a characteristic of the brave and stout-hearted. Fear is a strong emotion, it brings darkness with it, anger and guilt. Those emotions aren’t the emotions you would see in the buddha.  It is truly, really annoying that they always show the buddha as this happy motherfucker, all the time. Haven’t we realized that he said that “life is suffering”, do you really believe that someone who said that life is suffering is someone that is going to be happy all the time? I think not but, back to A, when he said no, he didn’t want to show vulnerability. Yoda obviously knew that he was indeed afraid, and honestly, pissed as fuck, who wouldn’t. But he said no, he swallowed it and defensively said no. This is why yoda didn’t took him. It takes balls to accept your suffering, but you know what takes more balls? Accept your suffering and be brave after you’ve accepted it, that is courage, that is the  Jedi way. Buddha was a Jedi, he was a master jedi. He accepted suffering and life’s fuckery and therefore transcended it.

There is physical evidence for this as well. Lobsters. Lobsters have the same chemical compounds that humans have. One of those is serotonin. Serotonin is important because of dominance and hierarchy. Have you ever seen a “bro” that wants to impress?, or just won a fight? they expand their chest like gorillas, sometimes they even pound them. Well, lobsters are the same, when they win a fight, they expand, they make themselves bigger.

This is important, very, very important. Humans run on serotonin as well, so when we win in life we expand, when we lose, we retract, and you know what is very interesting as well? This has to do with vulnerability. Your chest is unprotected when you expand just as with lobsters, you are open to life, you are signaling that you can handle whatever shit test life throws at you. Lobsters are the same. And do you know which lobsters and what humans lead and reproduce more? Exactly, the vulnerable ones. Isn’t this amazing? Accepting your fear and acting anyway, is the buddhas way.