Break free from social restriction.

No Comments

First things first. What is society?

Society is a combination of individuals. Individuals with different tastes, different ways of seeing the world, different perspectives.

Society is a beautiful thing, it is very, very diverse. Every person you will ever meet in jimi-hendrix-8150your life is unique. This is amazing in some ways but not so nice in others, I want to talk about the not so nice.

The not so nice part about society is that several individuals will want you to act in ways that please themselves, not you necessarily.

This is a basic restriction to your freedom.

If we are looking to please everyone all the time, we’ve got huge problems.

It’s important to know that there is really no correct ways to live. People will like you for some things and scorn you for others, you will never be “liked” by everyone. It’s just impossible.

This is why you must ask yourself.

What do you like most in life? Honestly. What do you do in your free time? What would you rather be doing right now?

This line of thinking is paramount.jimi-hendrix

Freedom is available to us at every moment.

There are literally billions of people in the planet. Maybe where you are at today is not your place, if you are not enjoying yourself where you are you should just simply move. Really, it’s that simple.

Not being true to what we really like is a huge mistake. Think about it. If you pretend to like things you don’t really like you are just going to keep reinforcing that type of stuff in your life.

We’ve all been there. Pretending we like some type of music we don’t really like, trying to talk about something we don’t really know anything about.

I mean, we don’t have to be running all the time  of everything we don’t like but the problem is faking we like it. It’s ok to talk with people for a moment about things that we don’t really like, but, years doing things that we really don’t like, really?

That exactly there is the problem, faking stuff so hard that we grab a mask and put it for so many years that we don’t really know who we are anymore.

The time to do and be who you want to be is now. You don’t like your group of friends? the-thinker-3good! time to find new ones.

Life is abundant. There are countless cities, billions of people, and millions of potential partners. To be unique you have to embrace yourself fully, don’t be restricted by society.

There is a tribe out there for everyone of us, but if we act and do things that don’t really resonate with who we are, how are we ever going to be found out by out tribe?

The time to be who you really are is now. Honestly. Just think about the places where you would rather be the most. There, there is your tribe. Friends and relationships can be found literally every time we are in the street, faking your identity is costing you amazing opportunities at every second.

Fuck everything that does not suit you, the right team is there, we just have to find it.


Donation for the cause

A stoic boldly leaps into life, he does not question himself wether to act or not, the decision has already been made, we want to help you become a stoic. Thanks for the support



Getting lost to find yourself

No Comments

There are times in life we feel lost, utterly lost.225px-Magritte_TheSonOfMan

I’ve certainly had a few of those. They are not pretty, I think so because we are alone during those times.

No one can really tell us what to do. Really, nobody knows us as well as oursleves and if we don’t know what to do or where to go, how the hell is somebody else going to know?

This are the times in our lives when the saying  “Sometimes you have to lose yourself to find yourself” fits perfectly, because indeed, that is what happens.

What does that phrase means

Sometimes we have to lose ourselves in order to find ourselves.

What do you guess? Think of a time in you life when you felt lost. I can give some examples. Are you happy in your job? Are you happy with yourself? Right now, do you feel amazing of waking up tomorow for work? Ha, if not, I’m guessing you are a bit lost.

2630429-ZUXILJLB-7Good! Being lost most be a good thing isn’t it?! At least we now know we are on the task of finding oursleves.

Not long ago I had a girlfriend that always asked me what I wanted to do with my life. To be honest, my answers were lame, I really did not knew much about what I wanted to do and it was embarrasing to say the least.

One night I came home furious at myself and started to ask  what is it that I wanted to do with my life. Ha, I remember writing in a notebook random things that I wanted to do like climbing Mt. Everest and buy a Harley Davidson.

I felt lost.

With time I began to realize that the reason I was lost, was not because I did not knew what to do with my life, but because I had lost myself.I mean, think about it, I wanted to climb a fuckin mountain, for christ sake, as if that would gave me the deep meaning I had lost.

Once it got bad (depression level bad) I began to form a relationship with myself again. I began to understand myself in the process and discovered that wanting to do stuff is an excuse for not knowing who we are. I mean, sure, climbing a mountain is great, but what I really wanted to find up there was myself, my long forgotten self.

Being lost gets you in touch with yourself again. Feeling lost is something very, very personal. We all have different journys and I know it’s scary, I’ve been there myself.

People spend their lives in college and then at work and all the time we are told what tomonk praying cave do. People like being told what to do because taking decisions is scary. There is no ultimate answer for what you or anyone else have to do. I can tell you to live you life in this way or the other, but in ultimate instance, its your choice, you have to make a decision of what you like and what you think living is worth for.

Not until you are really lost you find yourself.

Finding yourself is amazing, you are no longer waiting for someone or something to show you the way.

Please sit and meditate on this. Develop a relationship with yourself and I promise that you will find your voice, your unique voice, and once you find it, you won’t want this amazing ride we are in to end.

Another thing

Don’t wait! People try to figure their whole lives what to do and by the time a decision is made, they’ve become older. Don’t let that happen. Get lost, find yourself.

Donation for the cause

A stoic boldly leaps into life, he does not question himself wether to act or not, the decision has already been made, we want to help you become a stoic. Thanks for the support


Reflections, Stoic advise, Uncategorized



Then how can I free myself ?  you ask. You cannot escape necessities, but you can overcome them.” Seneca


Freedom, such a beatiful and grandious word.

Freedom is our highest value and yet, we are not and don’t want to be free at all.

Free form what?

Freedom from care is what I would like to argue. Bear with me, as I organize my ideas.

We all live in our subjective realities. Meanings differ like songs differ from one another. Freedom can be seen in many contexts, depending on the man and on his level of wisdom and understanding.

A vile man would argue that freedom is the satisfaction of every desire, even petty ones. Every food craving, sexual or anything that the body requires to satisfy a hole that can never be really filled. There is no freedom in craving. Pursuing cravings and physical desire uninhibitedly just makes us slaves to those very desires, and so freedom is not achieved.

If freedom is not to be found there, then where do we have to look?

What is freedom anyway? I’d define it as a state, a state in which the individual or the thing itself is not attached to anything outside that mandates a determinate action.

What are those things “outside” of ourselves that mandate action?

We could argue that it can be a tyrant, the state, our families, our cravings, just about everything.

What is truly ours? in ultimate instance?

Victor Frankl, psychiatrist and jew survivor of the holocaust, writes beautifully in his book Man’s search for meaning:

victor franklEverything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

Viktor E. Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning

There, deep inside ourselves, lies the last of human freedoms, the capacity to choose our attitude towards fate, only once we have made this choice can we start acting as individuals and speak loudly to fate where it is that we want to go.

In life, there comes a time to make a decision. I’d say it’s the ultimate decision of a human being. That decision is how we are going to look at the world, as an oppressor, or as a friend. How are we going to live, voluntarily or forcefully?

There, in that question freedom takes its true and last meaning, we are free to make that choice and that choice is the most important choice we will ever make.

Albert Einstein backs this.

“The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe.”― Albert Einstein

Let me explain.

When we do things forcefully, we don’t enjoy them, we don’t put our light into what we are doing and so we act from darkness. We are not making a choice by living this way, someone is making the choice for us. This is not freedom.

When we choose to act, to grab any challenge that life gives us, we are acting from ourselves, our light is on and we can see things that we couldn’t see in darkness. This is freedom, the choice to act voluntarily and willingly.

This is the ultimate freedom.

Hope you all make the choice to live freedom this very moment.

Best of luck friends or better, inner wisdom.

Donation for the cause

A stoic boldly leaps into life, he does not question himself wether to act or not, the decision has already been made, we want to help you become a stoic. Thanks for the support



Jimi Hendrix lesson on authenticity


So, I wanted to improve a prewritten article, but as Jimi Hendrix plays this:

It’s just impossible to not find some inspiration. There is something about this song that touched me, very deeply.

Have you come to a point to your life, were you know who you are and what is it exactly that you have to do?

Personally I’m still finding that out, sometimes, somedays I see the light quite clearly, somedays I think to much and no answers arrive, but hey, it’s all about keep searching.

But this song, oh this song is just the pure definition of authenticity and individualism.


That is a nice word. What comes to your mind when you think about an individual, better yet. An authentic individual?

There is something about this song that tells me what an authentic individual is. That song does not speak about perfection and yet it is perfect. It’s a song charged with feeling man. It has sadness and a cool in it and hope and courage. And watch what I’m doing! I’m speaking the feeling it evoked in me, what feelings does the song evoke in you? We are all different, we’re all filled with so many different experiences it’s just amazing to think about how unique we all are.

That is authenticiy. Jimi’s song is not a happy song, it is a deep song. Now, Jimi was cool


as fuck, and what I think made him that way, was his authenticity. He literally uses everything in him and puts it in the song, man that’s vulnerability, nothing speaks to us more to the core than vulnerability.

We are always trying to hide something, try to look tough or manipulate conversations and relationships. I have done it. It’s not real, and it’s definetely not cool. We are always trying to hang on to what we feel is cool, but what is really cool is what is real.

Real is happy, real is love, real is everything.

Authenticity is using every bit of our unique beings to paint life with our unique color.

God that is a good song.

Vulnerabilty requires courage. That’s the real stoic attitude. I imagine Seneca and Marcus rocking to this song, saying: This is definetly it!

There is great power in becoming who we really are. Authentic individuals.

Donation for the cause

A stoic boldly leaps into life, he does not question himself wether to act or not, the decision has already been made, we want to help you become a stoic. Thanks for the support


Psychology, Uncategorized

The Shadow

No Comments

I want to be honest here and speak from experience so I’ll explain to you my perspective on what the shadow is and why it is the single most important part of ourselves if our goal is to grow and become complete human beings.

The shadow is everything in yourself that you are not aware of.

It is no easy work, making the unconscious, conscious.

The shadow manifests itself every time someone makes you feel angry, every time you feel jealous, everytime you see someone and become enraged. That is your shadow, all that bad feeling is something in yourself that you don’t like and hide (you don’t accept it), so it becomes tense inside and knots form in the belly, stress builds and the shadow grows.

Have you ever seen a movie about war or just about criminals and feel a sick sympathy for the bad guy? We all have, at least in some personal way. This is the shadow.

However, everytime we see some good or worthy action, the shadow is that as well, you see, the shadow is not something good or bad, it is just a part of our psyche.

We go through the world managing as best as we can, in order for us to do that we have to learn, and when we are young we learn a lot, and fast.

Just imagine the fact that for the first 10 years of our lives we need our mothers to take care of us. What happens is that we become cultured creatures. We need to cope with society to survive. When you are little you don’t know much things so you look outside and try stuff out to explore terrain. Exploring makes us conscious of what can be called good or bad, at least in your world.

Maybe you liked to scream, but you tested your screaming ( maybe a singing calling) and got punished by it, so you suppressed and repressed that urge. Maybe you liked to kick your brother, and then you learnt that it was not a very good idea as he is much older and bigger than you.

So, as you move through the world you experience stuff and that stuff makes you learn what is good and what is bad. This is all very subjective and can be just plain wrong. This is how our shadows formed. Things happen in our life and we learn it to be good or bad depending on how it is presented to us and we act upon what we think is correct. If you were born in a family of doctors, you learnt that you learnt that “success” is dependant on whether or not you become a doctor.

One example in my family is, now that I remember, nobody could have something, that the whole family didn’t have. Say, if we were going for ice cream, everybody should have ice cream.  That seems pretty normal, but what happens when you take that idea to the world outside your family?

What I saw is that I lost my ability to be egoistic at times, and I tried to hide my hard earned stuff, pleasing others all the time and feeling guilty when someone else is not enjoying what I am enjoying, that is not right, but then again, when I think about it, is not something bad, it just is and what would be truly bad is myself not being conscious about it.

Every shadow is different, our experiences mold us into what we are now, and if we do not know how is it that we operate we will just keep operating the same way through our whole lives. Most of our actions are unconscious, so most of our actions happen in the shadow realm.

Not every part of the shadow functions against us. When we become conscious about our shadows, they actually become jewels.

But first I need to talk about the phenomenon of the ego.

Our ego is constantly trying to maintain its image.

I is is basically not completely ours as well. It is just the recollection of the rewards and punishments we got as we grew up. It’s what the world outside told us what we were supposed to be and we, subjectively interpreted and acted upon.

Maybe we were rewarded for being nice to people as my case is, maybe we were punished for being greedy as kids or maybe we were rewarded for humility.

All of these manifests in the ego and becomes our way to function in life. This is just bloody interesting because you see, maybe we want to be rich, but for example in my case, if i would get to rich I would feel too guilty and therefore maintain my economical status thinking that i don’t deserve as much because I’m praising my humility and therefore protecting my ego (leaving me in the same place).

Maybe you are a great public speaker but you were told that being quite is what is nice so you don’t really exploit that attitude. Our ego and our sense of self, is not our true personality, in all ways it functions more like a prison, a prison of belief to which we are nervously  attached to because we don’t know any better.

But there is a way out and that is attention.

When you see a movie and you feel good about someone, what do you feel good about? Maybe gladiator, what do you find great about the character? His courage? His family values? His indifference to carnage? Or a villain, the joker, for example, many people feel sympathy for him, maybe you like that he laughs at danger or that he literally burns money just to show that evil is what moves him. Maybe you like his lack of empathy and whatever else.

This is called projection. Everything I just mentioned you yourself are, everything you like about the villain or the hero, you yourself have. You see every person sees something different. We see our abilities and values in the character we admire. They might not be pretty but they are there. We are villains and we are heroes inside, we are not just one united being, there is evil, and there is good within us. You don’t want to suppress evil, as evil has , many gifts, wouldn’t you like to have all that you admire in the villain and use it for good? I certainly as jung famously said, dont want to be a “good man” I want to be complete and I want to be great.

Your ego imprisons you, you don’t need to act as what the image of yourself tells you, you can act from value, which is hidden inside you.

In the shadows, projection helps us figure out what our potential is and what is it that we value the most.

We can use projections to define our strengths and values but we are not all strength and power. We are also weak and pitiful. Projections works just the same, when someone disgusts you, a poor men, or some fat guy eating kfc puring ranch over it, think deeper, we see in others what we admire or hate about ourselves.  We do not see them objectively, but quite subjectively. This happens everytime we get angry and blame someone else of something, when we are not doing well in business, when we feel jealous. Every Time we are being a “victim” we are protecting our ego, projecting our insufficiency and incapacities into someone else. But neglecting this part of ourselves is neglecting our shadow and if we don’t attend this injuries sooner or later, they become big and scary and manifest in our lives in one way or another. Be careful with what you criticize and what you are a “victim” of, for those are the areas you need to work the most in.

This is not “bad” it just is, it is the ying yang we carry in us, as the whole existence does.

There is a scene in the dark knight, were the joker has the chance to kill batman, he has a knife in his throat. Batman tells the joker to kill him, but the joker says, no no no no, you see batty, you complete me.

This tension is what makes life possible, we cannot neglect our disgusting side as it shows us what our inner hero need to work in, our dark side gives something to fight with and our bright side gives us something to fight for and realizing that the two are essential for you to be complete, is transcendance.

This realization makes you understand your suffering, and understanding and acceptance it what makes us transcend it.

nothing in yourself is to be neglected, attention and acceptance is our duty if we are to become complete and individual human beings.

This is why this journey is imperative for everyman to become a man, a complete man.

Psychology, Reflections, Short mornings, Stoic advise, Uncategorized

Stoicism, the right way.

No Comments

Why do some things affect us more than others? A friend of mine once told me that the things that affect us emotionally the most, are the parts of ourselves that we need to work  the most on ourselves as there is something unresolved within us in that specific area.hydra

Unconsciously we want  and maintain behaviors in real life that consciously we deny or hate. It can be anything, maybe you hate your job, and you know what you have to do to get a better one or to start one yourself, but you don’t. Unconsciously you are looking for something there, maybe protection. Many of the situations in our lives are because of this, fears that we don’t even know are there. I had one of these experiences today as I woke up and I can tell you friend that the unconscious is real, very, very real.

I have used stoicism to make my life better, and it has become better in many ways.

Stoicism makes you a person of grit, but today I had a realization that took my understanding of stoicism a bit deeper.light_in_dark

Stoicism can help you deal with all of  your problems. It helps you transcend them and transendance of oneself and obstacles most be stoicism’s aim.

Because, it can be used incorrectly.

How? Let’s suppose that you are in a situation in your life that you personally don’t like or that you like but that you don’t really know the why of it.

It can be your work, you fill pissed about it, but you don’t do anything to change it. We can make excuses and rationalize that we are too tired to do something else in the day, but, unconsciously, maybe that’s just what we want (feeling protected and not being responsibles for ourselves, just blaming everything but oursleves).

Maybe we just want protection from the world and we take the job and the boss as a father, just changing some figures for others, as long as it fills the role hey.

Maybe it’s something that we like, like, commonly , a romantic relationship, and you love it. Because, consciously we justify it with feelings of “love” but maybe unconsciously we want another figure, some oedipus complex (our mother role), I know it sounds weird but you are looking for the role to be filled, nothing else. Love most come from yourself, if we demand it, we are not really in love, we just want something. 

So, you and me need to figure out what is happening, and make the unconscious, tumblr_neyqf51MMC1qmbg8bo1_500conscious. Face our fears, our inner fears and our core fears so we can transcende them.

Stoicism however can be understood in many forms, think about it, it can be counter beneficial for you, if we use it to justify our actions based on fear, thinking that we are acting courageously (like enduring the job or painful relationship).

When it comes to make the decision to live courageously it means that we are acting from love, form amor fati. Fear and Amor fati are two very different things. If we, however  act from fear deep inside, like not pushing for a better job or not being as great as we can be, we are acting from fear.

If we stoically support our fears and live despicable lives because we do not consciously know what we are doing, we are using stoicism wrong, in fact, it is not stoicism, it is just a justification to keep on the petty behavior.

Stoicism acts from love and courage and most of the time we think that there are challenges outside ourselves, but no. They are never outside, remember what is it that we have control over, ourselves. We must face our inner fears and understand ourselves truly if we want to be truly stoic. We cannot have fear inside and courage outside, that’s just simply not stoicism.

We must have courage to live truly inside and outside. Pay very close attention to yourself, what you are doing in life and ask questions, whether stoicism is a deep core philosophy in yourself or just a facade to hide your inner child.

I wish you all the courage and greatness of a proud warrior friend.

Good morning

Donation for the cause

A stoic boldly leaps into life, he does not question himself wether to act or not, the decision has already been made, we want to help you become a stoic. Thanks for the support



Rule over yourself

No Comments

Why, exactly, would you have to rule over yourself? tumblr_neyqf51MMC1qmbg8bo1_500

A king decides what happens in the kingdom and what not, he is adviced often, but the ultimate word is his, our inner world works much like this, much more like a kingdom than a united entity.

Stoicism aims for control over ourselves, control over emotions, desires and actions. We do not aim to supress this altogether, but we aim to manage it, to rule it and this is why we rule over ourselves.

I find this approach the more practical.

If we are to “rule over ourselves” we must use the phrase apporpriatley. When we say “control yourself” all the weight and magnificence of your inner power is diminished. “Ruling over ourselves” gives the phrase back his magnificence and royalty.

Try to imagine yourself as an ancient realm, an ancient realm of magnificent power, a Witan_hexateuch.jpgtrue empire. The realm is composed of your consciousness, the great king. Every king has a courtwhich gives advice to the king. The court of course is very useful, kings, as presidents and leaders today, do not take action or decisions of his own accord, they most listen to the expereinced court, or gabinet that will help them better the empire or realm. Every emotion is part of your court,  they advise you as to what is better for the realm. Every member of the court has to be properly addressed, fear, sadness, joy, curiosity, every one of them is valuable as in they have something to communicate to the king about its kingdom.

When the king wants to be good and great all the time or just wants to hear good news, the kingdom can suffer. If there is a war going on and the king cannot make calls or lets fear rule instead of him or madness or greediness, the empire will soon be lost to his inability to rule, everything most be assesed by the king as he has final word.










what does ruling over onself really mean. i believe it has to do with control, to be the ruler is to be skeptic about our reactions, mostly impulsive behavior.


Stress as Strenght

No Comments



If you’re going through hell, keep going.

Winston Churchill

I just could not miss a picture of this great man to begin with. Winston Churchill had the most stressful job in the world, leading a war, whichever quote you find about him, basically states fortitude and attitude. Stress as strenght is about this, is not about bearing the cross painfully and suffering, but rather joyful and willing. This is what stoicism is all about.

A friend once told me that we are always going to fall into the same mistakes over and over again until we learn from them. Your stress, is your strength, it is just  disguised as malady ,  but it really is a valuable lesson and if used correctly fuel for action.

Treat him as a teacher, use it for you instead of against you.

Sometimes life is hard.

Business stagnates, bills sum up, dreams can be seen as unreachable or our relationships aren’t as pretty as we expected them to be.  Quit expecting.  

There is a choice, the choice is the power of  perception and of action. First you disarm 51a7fb95d69a284ee9eeb72a27644eb7--photography-art-night-photographystress, you take its power, this is done by correcting our perception about our problems, our brains are designed to solve problems, that is its main function, but you cannot solve the problem if you believe its unsolvable,. How you think about problems greatly determines their magnitude. There has to be first a change in our perception first and then we have to punch back, we have to solve problems (stress) and give rise to new and better problems. Stress is a constant, and that is a good thing. 

There is great power hidden in this idea. To begin with I want to share with you the power of controlling our emotions, choosing to see reason in every situation, to steady our nerves, to ignore the petty limitations of others, placing things in perspective and choosing the power of the present moment. The power to be the creator of experience.

Choose attitude, choose altitude and choose perspective.


“Sow a thought and you reap an action; sow an act and you reap a habit; sow a habit and you reap a character; sow a character and you reap a destiny.”

Ralph Waldo Emmerson



I want to you to get to know Victor. Victor was a jew during the holocaust and he endured the most horrible and excruciating pain you could never imagine. He was physically tortured, most of his  family was killed by the nazis and every single day of his life during his imprisonment , he had to endure the intolerable  humiliations from the guards and life was just miserable in every possible way.

The interesting part in this story is that he was a psychiatrist. His name was Victor Frankl and he wrote a magnificent book narrating his experience called Man’s search for meaning. During his terrible experience he came to a realization. He discovered the last and most meaningful of human liberties, the liberty within himself, he realized that nobody could take how he responded to what happened to him, that power was his and only his, he took everything that happened to him with character, he had the lost choice and no one could take that away from him. He chose attitude. Just pure badassery.

This is the power of perception.

As Ryan Holiday says in his book, the obstacle is the way, our perceptions can be a source of great strength or of great weakness. Think for a moment in your head of the biggest and scariest problem in your life right now. Many times we see this problems as scary things we’d rather avoid, but what if it was the opposite, what if you were the kind of person that craves those types of problems, that enjoys them. Simply because it gives you the opportunity to prove yourself worthy, it gives you the opportunity to have some fun in your life. Fear and excitement, are experimented, physiologically, equally in our bodies. It’s perception  that makes them different, and attitude is within our power. Fear, in this scenario can be seen as a life enhancer feeling, not as a prohibiting one, and this is why I believe that  stress can be converted into  strength.

Emotion control, self ruling. OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

I like to think of emotion as court advisers, they are good advisers, however the ultimate choice is of and should be, of the king. Only he has the ultimate power to rule.

When we control our emotions we remain as the spirit of the samurai warrior, calmed and imperturbable.

What we want to achieve here is objectivity, we cannot act correctly if we inflate everything that happens.

This is why when you are in control of your emotions, you can see the truth, and truth is very valuable as it is the nearest thing we have of reality, we need to operate always on reality, not on imagined fairy lands we create for oursleves. 


The next time you are feeling stressed and under pressure, practice first breathing  5 times, this reconnects you to your body and the present situation.

Then, understand that you are a human and that your emotions are just natural, and you are not so special, there probably is a lot of people going through it right now, it is normal. However, you are different in that you choose to rule over yourself, like a king you do not react but consciouly asses your choices and feelings and then act accoringly.

Take a moment to close your eyes and think about the person that you admire the most, it can be fictional, now, think, how would he act in this situation?

Finally access your intellect and ask yourself what is the best way to respond to this situation, more so focus on the things that you can influence, don’t worry about what you can’t, and with this you’ll have achieved the right perception. What your best attitude is.


Don’t let the force of an impression when it first hit you knock you off your feet; just say to it: Hold on a moment; let me see who you are and what you represent. Let me put you to the test. — EPICTETUS

We have to realize something, life, is really subjective, it is extremely hard to see objectivity we paint all situations with our imagination, when we see a tree we remember images in our head of what a tree should be like, when we see a face we see what we want to see. We are always painting life as artists as to accomodate our past experiences, this however, becomes a profoundly subjective experience that can separate us from raw reality. 

What does “objectivity” means? To better understand this just think of it like this. When you say “this is the most terrible thing that could’ve happened” , you can just say “something happened”, but to put adjectives before what is, is  up to you.

What we want to do with our most annoying stresses is strip them off of opinions and prejudices. We want to see things for what they really  are.  Then, separate them into pieces and crush them.tumblr_m2g86xu6ta1qi7kauo1_1280.png

There are two ways of doing things in life, one is the descriptive one and the other is the actionable one. One has the “I” in mind,  the other is the no mind, just doing. Taking action. The samurai fought and operated in this way, the fastes way possible, because when you are in the killing business, you have no time to think, just act.

Think about it, we have all been in situations in which we have to do something, say play football, delivering a speech to coworkers or anything and we are thinking in everything but the task. You can, however, access directly the task at hand, and thus making it as good as it can possibly be made. Have you ever experienced this? This is doing things with quality and style, don’t rush, focus on what’s being made, focus on making it beautiful. Solve you problems (stresses) with style.

Style is putting attention and concentrating on what you are doing.



The next time you are, writing something, dancing or talking to your coworker, focus on just doing what you are doing as best as you can, be it what it be, this is a meditative practice, if your are cleaning the dishes, focus on leaving them as shiny as you can, if you are talking to someone, listen, if you are seeing a movie, really dig into it, do not worry about how things should be, take the  “I” off of the equation and just focus on what is and what is needed.

Focus on utility, ask yourself, what is it that you are trying to achieve and based on that do what is needed.

Think about it, this is the marvelous gift, of not caring what the others think of you, you want to do stuff, not appear doing stuff. Be the man, do not appear to being one.


Don’t lose your cool, never.36813hd.jpg

What such a man needs is not courage but nerve control, cool headedness. This he can get only by practice. — THEODORE ROOSEVELT


If there was a word we were to tattoo ourselves in our heads, it is this one.

Sangfroid:the composure or coolness, sometimes excessive, as shown in danger or under trying circumstances.

Every single ability you can think of is attainable by everyone, sangfroid is one of them.

All this is possible because of the ability of our brain to transform itself all the time. This ability is called neuroplasticity, and your brain is doing it constantly.  You are what you do repeatedly, you are,  therefore, your habits. Your brain is made of millions of highways of information, your habits are the freeways of your minds, your emotions, the way you eat, the way you respond to situations, they all are super highways you’ve developed through the years.

Never losing your cool is practice, all the time, for the rest of your life.

Neuroplaticity,  is a great blessing, and a great curse, when we are being petty, we are getting better at it, when we are being courageous we are also getting good at it, sangfroid is an obtainable ability.

Keeping our cool when we face our problems. Keeping our head while all others lose theirs, this is how you turn you stress in your strength, with perception (attitude) and then practice. You can always choose to get into a cool head and then act with resilience, adaptability, calmness and brilliance. Choose the school of adversity and stress, that is the best school to go through life. As John D. Rockefeller did.250px-John_D._Rockefeller_1885

The story of John D. Rockefeller is an interesting one, he was a massive predator in the business world, so much that in the beginning of his career he went into debt many times, he was not afraid of it, or he was, but his ambition was much more important to him than his fear, he said himself that he was instructed in the “school of adversity and stress” and he became the only entrepreneur in the world that made a monopoly in his lifetime. A monopoly so strong and unshakable that the government had to intervene to take him down. This man certainly knew how to use stress to his favor, everything in life is a lesson, and stress is the greatest teacher. Use it at your favor. Use it as a chance to learn.


I want you to think now again about the greatest stressor in your life. Write it down, and then write down the lesson that you are gaining from it, remember, everything in life is a lesson, and I really mean, everything.

Now, we don’t want to get good at receiving punches,  you can and must become great at giving punches back. Every bump in the road is a lesson, but the lesson is not to learn to take bumps, is more than that, you have to get the punches and learn to attack back.

You want to be attacking, always.

  • Write your bigger stressor or problem.
  • Write the lesson you think you have to learn.
  • Write the the best possible scenario given the problem is solved.
  • Ask yourself, what can you do right that moment that starts going to your best possible scenario.
  • Do that, get up and physically do what you know will get you going.


Be stoic, be great.


Stoic manners

No Comments

A stoic, is a buddhist with an attitude.

Nassim Nicholas Taleb

What are manners?

Manners are behaviors, behaviors are of the way we conduct and act through life, they are attitudes and actions.

Manners spring from character and character is force.

What is true force?

The force is our star, our inner star.

Not dependant, not on opinions, not on people, not on anything, it is like the sun, it radiates force and energy,the force is a fiery fire consuming itself, everything thrown at it makes it stronger, it makes the fire  antifragile (it gains more from everything).

Manners are a matter of antifragility, (read Antifragile by Nassim Nicholas Taleb).

Manners make a man antifragile, man gains strength and power by using them.

What would be the system of manners? that is a great question, how do manners work. What are they for?, lets see.

Manners are ways of being, they are forms of how to do something, how to conduct ones actions and attitudes more specifically.

Manners are beautiful and forgotten, they cement correct human relationship, makes human contact more true and emphatic.

There are the two big realms when it comes to manners. Attitude and Actions.

These are the two fundamentals.

Stoic attitude.

This is the inner game of stoicism, and this is as we very well know profoundly important. This is where it all begins, this is where the star makes the first fusion reaction that conceives great character.

Stoic manners begin with the stoic attitude.

The Buddhists are detached, but the Stoics in comparison, are detached AND active, they wage wars,  either in commerce or some other worthy need.

There is one thing you need to know.

If you see the buddha in the road, kill him and Marcus Aurelius as well.

This is all you need to know to get your attitude right, there are no right ways, but there is your way, be your own Buddha and your way will be the truth.

Ralph Waldo Emerson famously said, that envy is ignorance and imitation is suicide. Truth is something to be searched and offered from the inside to the outside.

There is nothing truer, than your way.

This is  the greatest contribution anyone can make.

If we are to search for truth, we are to search within, and let action spring from within. this is where truth comes from, and this is where right attitude comes from.

There are some traits that diverse right attitudes have, but don’t let this mislead you, as your aim has to be your way.

Willingness for action, Amor Fati.

Willingness, you have to be willing to face life. This can also be seen as courage but that is more an attribute so willingness, that is more actionable, always be willing to engage.

What you resists, persist. Amor fati, is an act of courage and acceptance, life is a messy business, and as messy as it is, you have to take it, be it something good or something bad. Due to our western perception of the word “love”, you can stumble into believing that the act of loving everything is something of a romantic relationship to life, disgusting. The word love is so much more powerful, I’d prefer to use the definition that psychologist Jordan B. Peterson used that is of the acceptance and worthiness of being itself, the worthiness of existence, the contrary is nihilism and hell. Amor fati gains a new aura if you think about it this way, this is love of everything, love of existence, as messy and chaotic as it may be sometimes, Amor fati is the conscious action of acceptance and non-resistance to what is, it is an act of courage, it is an act of defiance.


This is because the search is over, the only search that is left is the truth search, your truth. Nothing outside of yourself is to be searched, those are only ghosts, fleeting ghosts.

This is why you are no longer reactive, you can think of it like not searching for cool, but more like being cool, this is how action springs from the self, from truth.

Higher thinking and creativeness

When you act from within, you do your own thinking, and you make your own fun, this is harder, it requires more mental stamina, and we are not used to it.

You become the creator, not the consumer, the creator of awesomeness, of business, of plans. You become the problem solver, not the problem reactor.


You are free, you do not longer have to wait for someone or something to happen, when attitude springs from within, you are free to take action, your action which gives you clarity of intent.


Now that attitude is settled, action comes.

Stoic action, is quality action. How we do anything we do everything.

When the attitude is right and it comes from truth, from personal truth.  We are ready for right action.

Quality is making everything as fine as we can possibly can.

From walking as honorable, as great as Alexander the great.

When speaking, speaking as good as Socrates.

When doing anything, doing it as finely as it can be made.

Quality action is made from two things, and that is attention and caring.

Attention is catching everything, every detail, every word, every movement, we are fully awake, and caring puts your star’s warmth into it.

Quality can be intuitively felt.

Great beer, great whisky, is made with this intention, with the fire from within and the attention that it needs.

This is the stoic manners.












1 Comment

We are always in a hurry, we always want to be somewhere else, we always need, just one more thing to be happy, happiness is so illusory it makes me laugh.

Chasing the carrot, that has become our way of life. Since some beloved people discovered how our brains work with new stuff, how we are hopelessly addicted to dopamine and novelty, we have become hurried creatures, but what are we after? Are we after something? Is it joy and fulfilment what we are always looking for? Or are we running from something, something we are too scared to admit.

Bought answers are right, but it is undeniable that we respond more to fear than any other emotion. Fair enough, that emotion has led to our survival in this planet by not being eaten by a mighty predator.

But history has made a big ironical joke of predators, his most scared creature, has become his most savage predator, we humans do not only kill ourselves, but every species and living thing in the planet.

Anakin Skywalker, couldn’t make a good Jedi, simply because he was scared . Poor bastard, did you noticed everything that happened to him, his mother was killed, and he knew by who. He was son of a slave. I mean really, poor bastard. And now, great Yoda says you are afraid, come on man! Of fucking course he is afraid.

But here is the what Anakin says that I believed really got him in trouble, and it is that he said no. Vulnerabilty, is a characteristic of the brave and stout-hearted. Fear is a strong emotion, it brings darkness with it, anger and guilt. Those emotions aren’t the emotions you would see in the buddha.  It is truly, really annoying that they always show the buddha as this happy motherfucker, all the time. Haven’t we realized that he said that “life is suffering”, do you really believe that someone who said that life is suffering is someone that is going to be happy all the time? I think not but, back to A, when he said no, he didn’t want to show vulnerability. Yoda obviously knew that he was indeed afraid, and honestly, pissed as fuck, who wouldn’t. But he said no, he swallowed it and defensively said no. This is why yoda didn’t took him. It takes balls to accept your suffering, but you know what takes more balls? Accept your suffering and be brave after you’ve accepted it, that is courage, that is the  Jedi way. Buddha was a Jedi, he was a master jedi. He accepted suffering and life’s fuckery and therefore transcended it.

There is physical evidence for this as well. Lobsters. Lobsters have the same chemical compounds that humans have. One of those is serotonin. Serotonin is important because of dominance and hierarchy. Have you ever seen a “bro” that wants to impress?, or just won a fight? they expand their chest like gorillas, sometimes they even pound them. Well, lobsters are the same, when they win a fight, they expand, they make themselves bigger.

This is important, very, very important. Humans run on serotonin as well, so when we win in life we expand, when we lose, we retract, and you know what is very interesting as well? This has to do with vulnerability. Your chest is unprotected when you expand just as with lobsters, you are open to life, you are signaling that you can handle whatever shit test life throws at you. Lobsters are the same. And do you know which lobsters and what humans lead and reproduce more? Exactly, the vulnerable ones. Isn’t this amazing? Accepting your fear and acting anyway, is the buddhas way.